i don't know what's right and what's real anymore

i don't know how i'm meant to feel anymore
when we think it will all become clear
cause i'm being taken over by the fear

life's about film stars and less about mothers
it's all about fast cars and passing each other
but it doesn't matter cause i'm packing plastic
&that's what makes my life so fucking fantastic

the fear; lily allen

i'm completely in love with that song. the tune itself is oh so catchy and then the lyrics are pretty genius .. nice job.
i don't think i love anything as much as music. that's bad. but it's true. i'm such a failure -_-

so have you ever had a friend, that's pretty much always been there but you never really notice how much they care until you take a step back? this guy's amazing. thank you. the things i considered faults have become just minor quirks i'm learning to deal with (: i love that you actually take the time to teach me things instead of just making fun of me. and i love that you're a horrendous driver ! life's fun with you around.

mm.. orange juice ..

oh dakota

i know our love is new
i barely know ya
i've fallen over you
it's the way you do the things you do
that make me fall in love with you
dakota, are you in love with me too ?
dakota; rocket to the moon

i really truly love nick santino. he's adorable ! he's one of the only guys i've met that actually pulls you into him when taking pictures. cute !

so you think you're the shit. HAHA stupid whore. get out of my life and stay the fuck away from my friends. (:

i'm such a bitch. a bitter bitch at that. not good. today i was watching tyra for the first time in a while, it was about the tranny she had on ANTM aha ! but the commercial for another episode asked "if you know someone that's been flirtacious and you want to confront them, call tyra!" or something like that. i really wanted to call. hah ! i'm pathetic. but you're a man-slut !!!

tell me what's so bad

about feeling good ?
goodness gracious, ben lee is a lyrical genius. simplicity at it's best.

so i've had a bloody nose every day for the past four days. yesterday was flipping intense though, i was coughing up blood and everything.
i'm totally flipping out. i might die this week. went into the crazy dance / mosh pit at the AP tour. got knocked down once. this guy picked me up by my armpits. it was kind of awkward. BUT right after is when i started coughing up blood. um, if i have that thing natasha richardson had, i'd like to inform you all that i want to have my hair shaved off before i go into the casket (:

what if i really did die ? dang. i couldn't sleep last night. nervous that if i did, i wouldn't wake up. so i ended up crashing at four am, out of pure exhaustion. sigh.

i always feel like posting these things are pointless. like nobody ever reads them. but i know in reality people just cyber-stalk so nobody really "should" leave comments. -_- fail.